Friday, December 16, 2011

3rd Trimester : Reading & Reflections


Currently reading this (while re-reading Hypnobirthing by Marie F. Mongan). Actually I became interested to read this book after it was mentioned in the Hypnobirthing book as well as most websites on gentle, natural birth.

I. love. it!!!!

Just who is this Ina May Gaskin, you may ask.
Ina May Gaskin has been called “the most famous midwife in the world”. A pioneer in a millennium-old profession on the brink of extinction in her country, she combines scientific evidence and analysis with her own broad experience in exercising natural medicine. Ina May Gaskin is a role model for midwives who still dare to think in different paths, trying to implement more humane obstetrics in their countries, and providing women with the chance to choose the way of giving birth that seems right for them.
(For more, read here)

Why should I bother reading this book?
Well, unless you are living in a parallel universe where other (experienced) mommies DO NOT share their horrific, gory and scary birth stories, you should try reading this book. It's filled with positive, empowering birth stories from mothers who had natural childbirth without too much medical intervention.

I personally felt that listening to all the moms' and aunties' negative stories about birth a great disservice to us preggie mums2be... Sure, it's done with good intention (to prepare us for the 'inevitable' etc) but it just creates more unnecessary tension and fear. And you know what, tension and fear (and stress) are the last things you need to have a natural childbirth. Unresolved fear and tension will result in our body responding by getting tense and this results in pain. Pain because our mind and body is fighting something that is supposed to be natural. Our body responds to our state of mind. (refer to previous post, I've written something about this there).

Ignorance is NOT bliss.
To understand childbirth, we must first understand our female reproductive system. God has created us with the ability to give birth naturally, He wouldn't give us the short end of the stick by giving us the ability to procreate but then, we must suffer while doing it (will not go into a theological debate about this, TQVM!). I mean, look at the animals on Discovery/ NatGeo/ Animal Planet... Their labor and birth are so serene and peaceful, so why must it be any different for us humans? Animals don't over-analyze things, they relax and let nature take its course. That's what we need to do. Have some faith in our own body and its abilities.

Before reading more about childbirth, I must admit that I was feeling a bit intimidated by labor and childbirth. I mean, who wouldn't? We've been conditioned by the society and the media that childbirth is painful and dangerous and probably fatal. Look at the scenes in TV dramas and movies, you'd get what I mean. Thankfully after joining and participating in the online support group, I started to do more reading on gentle, natural birthing without (or with minimal) medical intervention (induction, painkillers, epidural, episiotomy (ouch!), etc) and also gaining more information on alternative choices of birthing (waterbirth, hypnobirth, etc). I have always had the belief that medical interventions should be used only if there is a clear and present danger to both mother & baby. Sadly, sometimes hospitals and medical practitioners use medical interventions to make it easier & faster (for them) without any regard to whether it is necessary at all.

Episiotomy is NOT a must.
Surprised? Don't be. Actually episiotomy cuts take longer time to heal (and more painful too) than natural tears. Actually tearing can be avoided if we only push when the body is ready, not when the nurse or doctors tell us to. There are also many labor positions to try: hands and knees, squatting, etc (on your back, legs up in the air is for the convenience of the doctor, definitely ain't doing us any favor). Oh, and read up on perineal massage. That one helps too, I'm told
:-)

There are also other practices that are questionable yet widely practiced in many hospitals. Such as, no food & drink before labor. Without food, in labors that can last anytime between hours and days, how on earth could we expect a laboring woman to have any energy at all to 'push'? I doubt that she will even have any energy to lift her arm, let alone to deliver her baby. The practice of not allowing laboring mothers to eat and drink was originally due to the fact that, should there be a need to perform surgery, the risk of the mother choking on her own vomit under the anesthesia can be reduced. However, this was waaaayyyyy back when General Anesthesia (GA) was still used. Nowadays, things are different. C-Sec does not usually require the mother to be under GA. But sadly, this practice of 'fasting' still continues. By eating, I don't mean having a big feast, just some light snacks for energy. But hey, if you feel like having Nasi Beriyani, by all means. He he he

Informed Mommies = Informed Decisions.
After educating myself on all these (did both reading and actual discussion with my friend who's also a doctor and other mommies who've had natural birth), I have decided on what I think is in the best interest of my baby. So mums2be, please don't be lazy to read and learn more about childbirth, after all, it is you giving birth and not others. Unless it's a risky pregnancy, your doctor should not have the last word. So be informed to make informed decisions. The choice is yours.

Oh, and I love these quotes by Ina May Gaskin;
“There is no other organ quite like the uterus. If men had such an organ they would brag about it. So should we”
“Remember this, for it is as true as true gets: Your body is not a lemon. You are not a machine. The Creator is not a careless mechanic. Human female bodies have the same potential to give birth well as aardvarks, lions, rhinoceri, elephants, moose, and water buffalo. Even if it has not been your habit throughout your life so far, I recommend that you learn to think positively about your body.”

Monday, December 12, 2011

3rd Trimester : Any Day Now!

I know.

I've been neglecting this blog. Procrastination is seriously a blogger's downfall. Maybe I'll just blame 'mom-nesia', you know, how absent-minded a mum2be could be sometimes (that's me!). I get so forgetful and 'blur-minded' and my RAM gets so lagging that even simple things could be overlooked by me... Haiya, Lil' Miss Perfectionist, apa sudah jadi???

Anyway, now I'm in my 35th Week (This Friday will be Week 36), so roughly I have around 2 to 4 weeks to go until it's showtime! He he... Am I nervous? Well, I'd be lying if I say I'm not but I'm preparing myself by doing lots of reading and preparing myself. One thing that I've learnt so far is that relaxation helps to achieve a somewhat 'painless' birthing experience. Being a cognitive psychology student I do agree that our state of mind affects our physiological response. Being scared will result in the body responding in a 'fight, flight or freeze' response. The muscles (in our limbs) will be in a 'flight' mode and most blood supply will be routed to these muscles so that we can get the hell outta here! Hence, the muscles in the uterus will be 'frozen' because our body decides that it's is unsafe to give birth right there and then. Thus, painful labor lah... Because the contractions are there but the cervix won't dilate (because it's 'not safe') and this results in more panic and in the end, failure to progress usually results in an emergency C-sec... Ouch!

So what I did was I got in touch with a support group on FB, 'Gentle Birth Group', and I have learnt lots from them. I must agree with them that birth is supposed to be gentle and as natural as possible, unless there is a clear danger that requires medical intervention. Birth has been portrayed as a painful process too many times in the society as well as the media. Look at the birth scenes in the movies or TV dramas, most of it will show the laboring mother to be screaming her lungs out, with the blood vessels almost popping and bulging eyes (that's purple pushing by the way), so it's not a surprise that our psyche have been conditioned to believe that BIRTH = PAIN. Now tell me, who wouldn't be petrified by this... Oh, and those well-meaning (ye ke???) aunties and peers who gladly share their birth stories (lagi horror, gory and bloody lagi bagus) ain't doing you any help, baby! I usually just listen to their positive side, the rest I just let it slip (only if you have selective attention like me, this skill I have perfected after years of Mom's incessant nagging. Love you Mom!). Otherwise, just tell them, only positive birth stories please, save the gory ones for someone else... Surely they will understand and respect that. Kalau tak, just slap 'em la... Ha ha, sapa suruh tak reti bahasa ye tak?

I'm reading the book by Marie F. Mongan, titled Hypnobirth (What is Hypnobirth? Read here and here).. It's helpful and it does make me realize that birth is a natural process for all living animals and humans, just that we tend to over complicate things along the years. With the introductions of more and more medical interventions to make birth 'easier and painless', without understanding that each of these procedures carries a risk. So before making that decision to have selective C-sec or epidural, please read more about it... Educate yourself to enable you to make an informed decision. That's what I told myself every time someone suggested something to me. Just because you have degrees and certs lined up on the wall does not make you all the mightier and wiser than me... Heh! You have the right to decide what's the best for both you and your baby, don't just place ALL the decision-making in the hands of someone else. Hey, I changed my gynae just because both Hubby & I not comfortable with her. Turns to be a wise decision since I later learnt that she's one of the slice-n-snip-happy kinda doctor (C-sec rate quite high). Phewww!!!

So what I'm doing now is lots of relaxation exercises for both me and Baby (Baby loves Balinese Yoga Music, nasib lah Nak, kalau tidak habis lah labour room kena dengar lagu 'Moves like Jagger' during your birth... Ha ha).

So the Checklist before the Big Day:
1. Baby's clothes (diapers, suits, etc) - checked!
2. Baby's toiletries - checked!
3. Baby's Cot - checked!
4. Baby's car seat - checked!
5. Baby's stroller - checked!
6. Breast pump - checked! (Phillips Avent Manual)
7. Feeding bottles - checked! (TT anti-colic) - to be used once breastfeeding already established.
8. Storage bottles - checked!
9. Cloth diapers - checked! (6 pairs - 2 on the way)
10. Confinement set - checked! (Amway's Tropical Herbs. Chosen after thorough survey and feedback from other users)
11. Nursing Bras - checked! (Autumnz - comfy enough for me)
13. Disposable undies - checked!
14. Maternity pads - checked!
15. Hospital Bag - packed and ready to go!