MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells Rock!!!

Jingle Bells swing and jingle bells ring

...

Yep, that's the song that I sang during Carolling practice last nite. a la Jazz+Rock. Which really peeves (or impress) my friend Greg and he told me to do a solo rendition during the carolling. Sorry, no can do! hahah...

I love to sing. Have I ever told anyone that?

Going back on Monday for Christmas and a Festival back in longhouse. The festival is a grand one, Gawai Antu, anyone ever heard of it? Nevermind, I'll tell you... later. :)

Saturday having Christmas Dinner, will be cracking up my face trying to smile all night. A mean feat, considering that I expect the event to be the same old idea being recycled every year. Tell that to the 'ostriches' organizing it. (Ostriches - people who stick their head into the sand at the first sight of trouble). Don't get me wrong, I don't hate 'em. They provide me the regular amusement whenever I observe them. I just don't like 'em.

TTFN.

THE ABSOULUTE TRUTH ...

and nothing but the truth!

Ugh!!!

This's been waaay due since the promised post. I plead guilty for unintentional negligence. The past week been one helluva busy twister spinning me around, snapping me in twos or threes...

Sigh

Realized that I've been sighing more these days. Sigh. Too much things to think people. Studies are ok, just that I wish I could just focus on the studies and forget about the other stuffs. If only money is no object. If only Financial stability is not an issue. If only...

Everywhere around me there are students smiling and grinning happily. Why? PTPTN dah masuk. But for the PTPTN-less, oh how we hate times like these. Not as much as to hate them for having sponsors, but for the incrediblyridiculousabsofuckingly-long queue at the ATMs. Mind you, the population of the campus is somewhere around 10,000 and there are only 2 ATMs! A normal queue for 10 minutes max becomes a 40 minutes queue. Argh! Can't these OKBs (Orang Kaya Baru's) withdraw their money time nak gi shopping ke, kat Kch ke, malam hari ke? And the absolutelyuseless BAnk Islam ATM is malfunctioning. Which draws to mind, when are the other banks gonna come and open up ATMs here? Geeesh...

The one other reason I've been busy is that I've taken a part-time job as a lab demonstrator. The job, ok lah, the pay rather lousy. But what to do, better than nothing they say. and so I say ....


And this friend is preggie. Congrats 2u dearie.

You are 87% Capricorn

How much do you match your zodiac sign?

You Are a Hunter Soul

You are driven and ambitious - totally self motiviated to succeedActively working to acheive what you want, you are skillful in many areas.You are a natural predator with strong instincts ... and more than a little demanding.You are creative, energetic, and an extremely powerful force. An outdoors person, you like animals and relate to them better than people.You tend to have an explosive personality, but also a good sense of humor.People sometimes see you as arrogant or a know it all.You tend to be a bit of a loner, though you hate to be alone. Souls you are most compatible with: Seeker Soul and Peacemaker Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

Your Element Is Water

A bit of a contradiction, you can seem both lighthearted and serious. That's because you're good at going with the flow - but you also are deep. Highly intuitive, you tune in to people's emotions and moods easily. You are able to tap into deep emotional connections and connect with others. You prefer a smooth, harmonious life - but you can navigate your way around waves. You have a knack for getting people to get along and making life a little more peaceful.

What's Your Element?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*** Been busy as usual and doubly bored today, so decided to do all these quizzes. heheh.

Capricorn? Capricorn I am. And that means the birthday is cooommmmiiinnngggg near. Wishes are welcome, gifts appreciated, Money very welcome. Heheh

Bought a digital camera. I got it from BenQ. Quality is good considering the price. :)

been busy as a blind bat so will be updating next week with something interesting since there's BBQ on saturday with the boys and meeting on sunday. haha.

nonetheless, TGIF y'all.

My life is rated R.
What is your life rated?

QUESTION

Do we really know ourself? like real deep down inside to know your 'essence'? I like to say that I do but as it goes, the more I peel the layers, the more I realized that I don't really know me. As I said before, people are like matrushka dolls. There's always another layer underneath that layer.

And I'm not talking about what you do as in "I'm a student/husband(wife) of so-so/doctor/lawyer/etc. I'm talking about the real you. What's your essence?

What is real in life?

Who am I?

Who are you?

NEW HOME SWEET HOME

I've returned to campus. Busy chaotic life resumes. Haven't started class yet and I am already busy. Starting next week, class will start and so will job. Everyday will be lab-demo-ing for 1st year kids. *sigh* which means lesser times spent in lab. also, this semester i will start doing my research: getting a supervisor nuts enough to accept me, think of a topic, prepare the proposal, getting it rejected, revising, yadda, yadda, yadda. *sigh*

Uhm... off-track pulak. I've moved to a new house. Single storey terraced. Still in DI. Staying in a single bedroom. I can't share. Not because I don't like company but that I sleep late (2 a.m. is still early by my standards), so i don't think it is wise to have a roomie. My ex-roomie and I had a tough time because of this.

Members of the household: Yours truly, Alex, Sam, Nanie, Made and Biscuit (the dog), Bijou (the Hamster), Kura2 (the tortoise). Biscuit the over-excited-hyper-attention craving-oversized puppy will be leaving soon so maybe we'll get a cat instead.Hmmm....

Hungry... need food... gotta go

WHAT MY NAME SAYS

NAME ANALYSIS FOR: Chris**** Andria A******

Chris****:
You are a quick study, and can be self-taught. Your curiosity can get the best of you, but you must learn to concentrate. You work hard to achieve material success through your own efforts. You enjoy a challenge. You can take thought-directed actions. You are relatively demonstrative in your affections. You enjoy being stroked verbally and physically. You try to be prudent. You have good business acumen. Your privacy is important to you. You have a rich inner life. You need to learn to give and receive love for love's sake. You have a need to be assured of affection. You can handle details well. You have a methodical mind. You have much enthusiasm with a driving attitude toward achievement in life.

Andria:
You have much enthusiasm with a driving attitude toward achievement in life. You must learn to give 'wise' service and not be a martyr. You have a discriminating nature coupled with perseverance and family pride. You have a lack of confidence in your mental abilities and do not like being forced into giving your opinion. You need to learn to give and receive love for love's sake. You have a need to be assured of affection. You have a need to be up front.

A******:
You have much enthusiasm with a driving attitude toward achievement in life. You must learn to give 'wise' service and not be a martyr. You need to learn faith in place of fear. You need to learn the true value of material possessions. You have a natural protection in life. You are always saved - especially from yourself. You have a great deal of loyalty to those you love. You have much inner strength. You must learn to give 'wise' service and not be a martyr. Your independence and freedom are important to you.

Try it here

Hmm... Is it true? Do I believe it? Somehow I do but to a certain degree, maybe say 49% or 70% or...

WANTED! A DIGITAL CAMERA

Wanted! A digital camera that won't cost me an arm or a leg.

Any suggestions?

Budget is under RM600.

Thank you.

I edited my previous post.

To YOU

YOU

and YOU,

lucky you. You read the unedited version.

To the clueless you out there, you're wondering, What on earth made me edit my previous post, and what was it that i wrote that I have to review and edit it? That, my dear, I leave to your imagination.

Maybe you'd think that I've suddenly developed a fear of speaking out my mind, of being dead honest. You're wrong. It's just that my brand of honesty needs a steel heart to digest. and that might be more than what YOU, YOU and maybe YOU could take. So I gave YOU a watered down version, a wee bit diluted, but the punch remains. Sort of hits you like a gloved fist. Soft but hard. not to give you a vicious hang-over, but maybe just a lil' bit of bitter taste in your mouth and a soft pounding in your head.

and YOU, yeah YOU... shaking your head and asking wtf am I saying, just forget it. I'm not talking about you.

I'm just being me. Sarcastically honest temperamental me.

2nd CHANCES - KEEPING THE DOOR OPEN -edited

Reading her entry about giving second chances in relationship makes me reminisce on my own experience. She said that we girls always keep the door half-open even when we say that we are ending it. We believe in the miracle called second chances. Somehow things are going to work this time around.

Oh, we'll make it this time.
It will work out fine this time.
He's truly sorry. Surely he'll change.

You know, just like the time when...

You thought he was the one. The person that'll hold your hand as you walk the journey of life. You started as the best of friends until one day, you looked at each other and decided that the 'next step' is naturally the most natural thing to do. So you embark on the path of coupledom. You went on to experience the usual stuffs that couples have (well at least I think all couples went through this), you had our fair share of happy moments, tender moments as well as the ocassional bumpy rides. But you kept on. That's the beauty of infatuation really, you'll overlook all the weaknesses that exists. You're in love with being in love.

As time goes on, then you'll start seeing the cracks that were there. You start to think about the structure of your relationship. Is it stable? Is the foundation strong enough to balance the differences? You'll start seeing the bad and ugly side of that person. Yet, you still hang on to the relationship. For whatever reasons that you couldn't recall now.

Then suddenly, the fantasy ended. The beautiful dreams are snatched away from you. You're devastated, broken and hollow. Slowly you re-learn the life you had before you had him. slowly but surely, you began to pick up the pieces of your life.

Just when you started to move on, he came knocking at the door. No, u said, the door is locked. but he persists. begging. pleading. crying for forgiveness. oh, just to give him another chance. telling you what a fool he was for letting go a gem like you. Keeping the door half open, when you said that it was closed, you accepted him.

This time around, you've learned your lesson. You kept your expectations to a minimum, sacrificed your time to help him, please him, learned to accept the 'silence' sometimes. Despite all that, it's still hard. It hard when you do all the giving and yet, takes little in return. It's hard when you have to change, no, morph into something that you're not. But, very sure that this time, yes, this time it will work, you kept your optimism intact. Somehow, it's going to work. It must!

Then, again, the day came for him to tell you, sorry darling, this just wouldn't work. No no. It's not you. It's just me. and so on...

maybe this time around, you sort of saw it coming. You were prepared for it and were not hurt. Maybe it just stings a little. Whatever his reasons were, it simply didn't matter anymore. But since you've lost faith in him and the relationship, you let him go gladly. This time, you shed few tears. More out of anger to yourself and your stupidity than despair.

Or maybe you'll be even more broken. angry. mad. revengeful. bitter. and perhaps you imagine a thousand and one ways to make him suffer a horrible slow death.

but eventually, you move on. trust me.

Did it happen to me? Yes.

What happened to both of us now, you might want to ask.

We are still friends, though I kept it at a distance. He's always welcome if he wants to share about his problems, but I'll still keep my distance. No more frequent miss calls or SMSes. His number is filed under 'friends' and not 'special' anymore. My life has expanded into wider circle of friends, and I've spring cleaned my friendships, weeding out all the weeds, parasites and taking care of the genuine ones. But he's still there, albeit being a less active participant in my life, and I sorta like it that way.

Most importantly, I've learned to forgive and forget...and to forget about giving chances anymore. In the future, I'll close the door, permanently, to any more second chances.

My advice:
Men, you have only one shot at it. Use the chance wisely. There might be no doors to knock later.
Women, you have a choice. To be optimistic or to be real. Keep it open, keep it closed. It's your call.

Me, I move on. ^____^

MR WISE GUY

Something I heard this afternoon spoken with finesse by our very own 5-years old Mr. WiseGuy Celvyn.

(merajuk)
spoken to his Mom:
"Baka nya kitai nggau anak?" (Iban)
"Macam tu ke layan anak?" (Malay)
"Is that how you treat your child?"

Celvyn never fails to amaze me. Like Chechen, his younger sis, he could come up with unexpected answers or responses. Makes me wonder how he and she will be in a few years time.

Selamat Hari Raya folks! Tomorrow after church will be celebrating Hari Raya with my cousin in Saratok. Yummy-yummy foods!!!

COCKTAIL OF EMOTIONS

Today, or rather yesterday, brought a cocktail of mixed feelings to me. On one hand, it's a pleasant one as today is Deepavali or also known as the festival of lights. It's a feast celebrating the victory of good over evil. In Sarawak it is not celebrated as grand as in Peninsular Malaysia due to the small population of Indians/Hindus here. The first time I've experienced deepavali was when I studied in West M'sia. And the food isss............ Mmmmmm... Yummy!

On the other note, I felt the loss when I watched the evening news and I heard the announcement of Arafat's death. Though death is inevitable and somehow is something that could be expected after his condition deteriorated, I still felt hard to accept the reality of his death. I'm no ardent admirer or supporter of his, but growing up with his face and struggles aired on TV and the newspapers, I've came to be familiar with his fight for freedom and liberation. And the admiration sort of grew along.

I ask myself, "How could this person who's a stranger to me, that I didn't personally know, and yet develop sort of attachment to?". I think he is a larger than life kind of man. He isn't afraid to ruffle feathers, regardless of whose feathers he ruffles. How many people will speak up for what (s)he thinks is right? How many more will simply shut up and follow?

If we look on his life, or maybe one day ponder on the eulogies people say about him, we will realize that THIS man has gone very far indeed. He'd been banished into exile, placed into house arrest and if he ever put his head out of his house, he'll resemble swiss cheese, and he still continue the fight. Some said that he's a terrorist, but who wouldn't be one, if everything that you have is violently wrenched away from you? But I've seen him trying to get the peace process to succeed.

Peace process... Hmmmm... Another interesting area of his life. Honestly speaking, the peace process is dragging very slowly with little progress. If only everyone involved would put their egoistical calculative agenda down and start building on a common ground. And the other parties indirectly involved or involving themselves, to stop putting their noses in whatever that's not their business and stop taking advantages.

I think this is his wish. Freedom for his people, and peace in the region.

As Moses saith to the Pharaoh.... " Let my people go"


and I did a quiz...

You Are From Mars

You're energetic, althletic, and totally hyperactive. You love playing sports and being in the middle of all of the action. You're independent, courageous, and brave. Unafraid to do things your way. Mars can be reckless, quick tempered, and a little too spontaneous. So think before you act - and resist your natural urges to dominate others.

What Planet Are You From?

Update. Part One - of teachers

Sorry for the very short update yesterday. Was barely able to keep eyes open to check my emails. Hmmm... updates? here goes

Arrived in SK Nanga Beguang, Song, on Monday. Stayed here for the duration of me conducting the survey coz Bro. No. 1 is teaching here. Nice place on the side of the Rejang River (the longest river in M'sia). Rural place, lots of greens, but sadly no electricity and no cellular lines. Nak call, guna le 011. electricity is powered by generator.

Things like this makes me appreciate the hardships of all those teachers serving in the rural areas. They forgo all the 'luxuries' of urban life - electricity, piped water supply, etc- for the sake of providing education to the rural children. Coming from a family of teachers - Dad's a retired teacher, Bro & sis are teachers, a few of my cousins are teachers - i am very familiar with the sacrifices that teachers make. I saw Dad's passion in providing education to his students, emphasising the importance of learning to ensure that the students have a choice in getting a better future. Dad never complained about life in rural schools. Dad once served in one of the remotest school in Kapit and that was waaaayyyyy back in the 1970's where the trip from Sibu to Kapit takes a day and teacher's pay was not as it is now. With a small salary Dad provided for the family ( Mum, Bro no 1, no 2, and Sis. I came into the picture muuuucchhh later). I myself wouldn't know if I could survive what Dad went thru. I've always been proud of teachers.

But there are some issues that I've seen once I grew up. When I was in school, and when I taught in schools temporarily, the things I saw made me wonder whether the teaching profession is a noble profession. There are instances where I've seen those who became teachers for the sake of getting a job. Teaching is not a responsibility for them, it's simply a job. They have no interest to serve beyond the requirements. Going an extra mile is a burden to them. There are those who are in it solely for the attractive remuneration package. I'm not saying ALL teachers are like that, just a FEW (?!). There are SOME teachers who are really dedicated to their job and these are the ones that upheld the whole education philosophy. They instill knowledge, love of learning, morals, and values in their students. These teachers will leave an impact in their students' lives. I myself have greatly been influenced by some of my teachers.

Teachers leave an imprint in their student's life. Regardless whether it is a positive or negative. Student's remember their teachers, and classify them into groups - Good ones, Bad ones, and forgetable ones. Good ones are thoe who gave positive impact in their student's life and will surely be greeted in the Pasar looooonggg after their retirement with , "Cikgu masih ingat saya?"
Bad ones are those who the students remember too - albeit with less than pleasant memories. But still remembered.
The forgetable ones are those who did not leave an impact whatsoever. They are just like passing wind. Not remembered and forgotten.

HEAVY, SEXY EYES

Back from trip today.

very, very tired.

Grandma's here. She came here with me.

I'm sleepy.

*yawn*

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..........

CHECHEN'S HERE!

Chechen's here. I'm sooooo happy... *grin*grin*

The first thing she ask me was,

"Why is it that you are not here when I came?"

After which she stuck to my side. Reluctantly parting for a moment to greet her sister, she quickly run to my side. FYI, she also haven't seen her sis for the same duration of time. My, my, we are really devoted to each other, eh.

She squealed with happiness over some clothes that I bought for her. She quickly nags to have me bathe her so that can wear the 'baju baru'. No, she don't want sis to bathe her, she wants yours truly. hehehe. after bath, she paraded her new outfit.

In the evening, we have a sing along session. The song, "Pulangkan" by Misha Omar. She's good. although half the time don't understand what she's saying, she can sing. Me singing? My,my... you just wouldn't believe some of the things that I'd do for Chechen.

So, I've had a long day. Apart from 'layan' Chechen, I went to Sarikei to apply for education loan. Hopefully approved so I wont have to worry about funding my education. Applying loan from Gvt can be a very ^toot^ed up process.

Also, will be gone for a week. Got work to do outstations. Take care and Don't do what I won't do. *grin*

HOME - DAY 6

Nothing much today.

Watched some movies at home, read a bit, then meet a friend in town. Dad renewed my driving license, so today can drive around again... Hihihi...

Tomorrow eldest bro n family coming for the weekend. Real excited 'coz will be meeting my precious Chechen...

*excited*

That's why I am in a chippy, cheery mood and not the usual brooding self. The only person that never fail to make me smile is her, a 3-years old kid that's one pack of energy, wit, and innocence. She'd managed to stump me sometimes with her comments. All that honesty and innocence. She don't like my hairstyle, she'll say so. She don't like my clothes, she'll say she hate it. How i wish everyone will be as honest as she is, with a pinch of salt, of course.

I am a person who likes, no, values honesty very much. I've ended some friendships when i found that those 'friends' hid the truth from me. I hate being lied to. Not only it is dishonest, untruthful, it also insults my intelligence. Come on, in the end I'll still find out the truth, so might as well tell me the truth right now. I hate those people who are hypocrites. You got something you want to say, spit it out. What's the point of keeping it all in, sweet sugary smile on your face, only to tell it to another? I am a direct person, straightforward and open. That's why usually people mistake me for being rude, brash and unfriendly. Because I refuse to speak the untrue. If a person can't take the hard cold Truth, maybe i'll consent to a sweetened, softened version of truth. But never to completely lie to a person. If I can't speak what i have in mind, I'll just shut up. Zip.

Maybe that's what people should try. Shut up. Instead of gossiping and spreading lies.

So, somehow, this is true

You represent... anger.Mad at the world, eh? You have a tendency to...
freak out easily. Overly emotional about
everything, you're most prone to bouts of
cruelty and moodiness. Other people may be
afraid of the fact that you explode so easily,
but at least you're honest... even if you're
honest about not liking anything.

What feeling do you represent?
brought to you by Quizilla

HKK CRAZE

cast of HKK - Beautiful People

Railey and Richard looks yummy!!!

I know I am not supposed to admit this, but I am kinda hooked to the Filipino show on TV3 (4.30 - 5.30 pm, Mondays - Wednesdays). The same thing happened last time when PSY (Pangako Sa' Yo) was aired. At first I buat derk je, tapi pas tu alih2 boleh jadi minat pulak. Tapi biasanya tu dah tengah2 cerita baru aku naik minat. heheh...

The reasons i like watching HKK? Snooky is very beautiful, Richard & Railey are damn good-looking, everyone else is beautiful. So, 3-days a week, i'll indulge in escapism. To be transported into a place where everyone is beautiful despite being switched at birth-lied to-shot at-betrayed-become dirt poor-etc. Storyline-wise, macam biasa. For more, get it from here.

I hope I understand Tagalog so that I don't have to rely on the subtitle. They aren't always reliable you know.

And next week I'll miss a week's worth of HKK since I'll be travelling. *sigh*

p/s: anyone know where i can get the episode guide??

CRUEL WORLD

NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

ARGHHHH!!!!!!!!

WHY ME?????

WHY ON EARTH DID I HAVE TO SUDDENLY DEVELOP AN ALLERGY TOWARDS SEAFOOD???

WHEN SEAFOOD IS MY FAVOURITE...

AND WHY ON EARTH DID MOM HAVE TO COOK CHILLI CRAB????

WHY???

WHY???

***sulkily ate dinner------> fried chicken+veggie.... while everyone's enjoying chilli crab

I WANT CHILLI CRAB!!!

I WANT MY PRECIOUUUSSSS!!!!

p/s: If Mom cooks UDANG GALAH, that's it! I'm going back to campus!!! *merajuk*

HOME - DAY 4

My, my... I have such unproductive day so far. drop by for a while, post this lil' something and then i'll continue my reading.

What I am reading currently:

1. Why You Act the Way You Do? - Tim La Haye
2. Free to Love, Free to Pray - Max Ovilla
3. Rereading some books as well

What I am doing Now: Doing mindless quizzes that are not necessarily accurate but just for the sake of doing it.

What I get:

You represent... anger.Mad at the world, eh? You have a tendency to...
freak out easily. Overly emotional about
everything, you're most prone to bouts of
cruelty and moodiness. Other people may be
afraid of the fact that you explode so easily,
but at least you're honest... even if you're
honest about not liking anything.

What feeling do you represent?
brought to you by Quizilla

You're a Spring. You usually are very close-knit
with your friends and value everyone freindship
you have. You're a real people person and
everyone loves how friendly you are. You're
good with encouraging people but usually don't
like to be the center of attention. You are a
social butterfly and probably are in several
circles of friends but it's just because you're
well liked and you make people comfortable.
You're both fun and wise but you are very
realistic about life
What season are you? (pics)
brought to you by Quizilla


You are most like Robin! A leader and fearless by
nature, you tend to dive straight into
something without thinking. You have a hard
time trusting your friends sometimes and you
are extremely serious when you have to. You
don't like being compared to someone you are a
rival with and sometimes your temper gets the
best of you. Out of all of your friends you
might be the one who dreams to be leader or is
the leader. Whatever the reason sometimes you
need to look before you leap.

Which Teen Titans Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

My PETS

Since I was writing about my pet cat, think I'll continue with listing my Pets. These pets are not exclusively MINE but SHARED between me, dad and niece. except for the tortoises (read previous post).

1. 3 Cats [Adop, Ngiiiik & Ciku (aka psiko cat)]
2. 1 dog [Tommi]
3. 1 porcupine/hedgehog [Betty]
4. 9 tortoises [remain unnamed]
5. 3 fishes
6. 1 hamster [Taro]

We used to have an arowana but thanks to Bro. No. 2, the Arowana died.

Think that's a lot?

the CAT

Jun & Carneyz... read here for the psycho cats antics.

Latest update about the encounter between said cat and dad... Dad left calf got 4 (read FOUR!!) scars from the bite. Ouch!! No surprise for me, dad is still fond of the cat.

Luckily Dad is fond of animals (which is a trait that i inherited).

If mum, the cat is signing its own death warrant. Mum is definitely NOT fond of animals. except for tortoises. Don't laugh! We got nine tortoises at home. Why mum like tortoises, hmm... i don't quite know. low-maintenance kot.

SATURDAY MORNING ADVENTURE

When I wake up on saturday morning, dad took the cat from the cage and put it in my room. The cat is easily agigated by unfamiliar sorroundings and started swishing tail faster with increasing speed and loud MEOWS. feeling anxious, i just sat on my bed in fear and try not to make sudden moves.

"Easy cat... Good cat... Good kitty"

Suddenly the cat jumped on the bed and started to attack my leg and the pillow. I screamed for Dad. Cat jumped down from bed. Dad took cat away.

Luckily I was wearing my long Pajamas and the cat bit the fabric. No casualties, except for a traumatizing experience.

Well, that's my cat. A handsome, beautiful black-and-white cat with thick fur. albeit kinda loony.

ERADICATING PESTS

Pssstttttttttt......

Shhhhhhhhh.....

$h!T!!

bUttH3aD called this morning at 2 am. a few times. For what tf I don't know. Didn't pick up the friggin' phone. not nice. definitely not in nicey2 mood. I was friggin' trying to sleep. Changed the phone into 'silent' and continue to sleep.

Gawd! Can't they read the sign already?! I'm F-tired of the 2 of them . Enough already!

**(For the clueless - b3aVi$ and bUtth3aD are two (MCP - Male Chauvinistic P!gs) pests who by some freak of nature or whatever changes in the atmospheric condition, decided to make my life a living torture by relentlessly seeking my company. b3aVi$ thots that he's God's gift to women and women are supposed to fall at his feet *yerch!* - Really man, haven't you heard bout this invention called the MIRROR? (credits (again) to Mitch for this remark. How true). bUtth3aD thinks that he's a hero for broken hearts. Nah, go search elsewhere Jose! You'll get lucky, somehow)

What do they think I am? I hate jerks (or jerk-ettes) who got HUGE egoes and sooooo VAIN and with head full of AIR and lingers in their delusion that they are desirable. Somebody's gotta be cruel and slap them. not me. I'm too nice and I'm too nasty.

So I'm writing this for the Double Bs,

Sorry guys.
It's not working out.
I'm just TOLERATING you.
TOLERATING you doesn't mean that I LIKE you.
and I DON'T LIKE you.
go figure.
best of luck in getting a score (somewhere else)

Am I cruel?

nasty?

o_O

No, that's me being NICE.

really

WHAT I DID DURING MY 'SABBATICAL'?

You might want to ask.

Or you don't even care.

But I'm gonna tell you anyway.

Eat - Sleep - Read - Play PC games - Watch mindless reruns of TV shows & VCDs - Think about assignments - Play games some more - Go for cave trip - IMCS gathering - Think about Assignments - Panic b'coz of Assignments - Finally do Assignments - Still doing Assignments - Exams - Hand in Assignments

And yeah, don't forget, Add 'Lepak with Friends' every now and then.

Now you gotta understand why I am a slacker extraordinaire. I earned it. I'm just wondering how I've got THIS far academically with THAT attitude. Oh yeah, I am a SLACKER EXTRAORDINAIRE who's also an occassional WORKAHOLIC. Talk about contradicting stuffs.

Complicated? That's ME

HOME SWEET HOME... Part One

Am still paying all the accumulated sleep debts that i had.

Felt that i'm kinda lost touch with this blogging thingy after more than 3 weeks of sabbatical leave from blogging. Need to re-connect the wires n restore the blogging.exe in my mind. Tough exams and short papers to write kinda do that to your brain. short circuit a few here and there.

am i making sense?

am i?

am i? o_O

I'll get better soon. I hope.

Am wondering when am i going to Sibu to meet God-bro... Hmmm.... Probably have lunch with him and then go jalan2.

Oh ya, update... Bintangor now officially got its first traffic light... hahah... thought i'd never get to see one here.

Next week, start my work.

Goodnite.

I'M BACK!!!

Hi everyone!!!

Hehe. Am officially back from my 'pertapaan'. Hehe. Had my last exam last night. phew! Actually been busy for the last few weeks with my assignments, projects and whatnot.

Went on a trip to Fairy & Wind cave. Nice!!!

Went to a gathering with a rep from IMCS. Good fun!

Supposed to return home today but due to very unforeseen reasons, have go back tomorrow. Huhuhu!!!

Having my semester break. Will be travelling to Kanowit & Song as well for some work.

That's my short update. will write more when i'm back in bintangor.

TTFN.

UPDATE

Hallo...

Life's busy...

Beavis & Butth3ad's * back. Sht. Have to start with my invisible spells again.
Take care...

Goodbye...

* Credits to Mitch for coming up with this name to call this 2 people. Hahah... Very apt name for them.

I'm gone

HELP!!!

Help!!!

Am buried under tonnes of assignments and the deadlines are so-so near -

1. 15-pg essay on globalization or something-something and competitive advantage (progress so far : none)
2. 10-pg essay on strategic HRM & HRP(progress so far : 3 pages)
3. 5-pg review of 6 articles (progress so far : none)
4. Group case study (progress so far : DONE!!!)

On another note, I'll have my exams on these dates

13 October 2004 - Human Resource Management
18 October 2004 - Statistics
20 October 2004 - Management in the Workplace

In between scrambling and struggling to accomplish all of these tasks and feats, I still have to attend this seminar and go for a day-trip to explore the Fairy & Wind Cave in Bau.

Ah well, you just have to be me to achieve and accomplish everything with finesse despite being swamped and stuck in the messy $h*t. I don't quite know how, but somehow, I always managed to get my big fat cute arse out of the fire, just in time. Call it performance under pressure or whatever, I simply need the stress factor to kickstart me into action. When the deadlines are so near, see me fly! Oooh, I love those adrenaline rush!

Haha. On another note, I'll be going back home for my one-month break maybe on the 21st or 22nd October. Got internet at home so I will be hogging Dad's PC.

I'm gone

PREOCCUPIED

I am preoccupied at the moment.

Am bulding up a weblog for my society (GPK).

Will post something here real soon.

On another note:

I'll be going to this Seminar.

This weekend I'll be going to the seminar titled "Genesis of Music". Hope to enrich my skills in Praise & Worship. So, lemme warm up my vocal chords. Tra-la-la....

...and I'm gone.

JUST ONE

***pic is removed. another time i'll put in more. life's super busy again.

Here's a pic. The others will try another day.

SABAR, SABAR, SABAR

$^^%$#!!!

Am currently wrestling with the #$%^$! images to be uploaded. Stupid fotopages giving blardy problem. Have to wait till tommorrow lah.

Also at the %^^$ moment there's a %&^$@! presentation in my LAB and the presence of these people really bugs me. Plus, there a person that I am very, very allergic to is here. Sheesh, talking BULL!!!!

that's it. I'm out!!!

IN MY HEAD

Am currently brewing something in my head. We'll see where it shall lead us.

Take care ppl. Tommorow's a holiday so kick back and relax. chill out. go out. dance. swim. whatever you enjoy. As long as you're happy.

NO PICTURES

Eh, sorry folks...

Forgot to copy some pics frm my home PC into my thumbdrive ---> resulting in ... Ta Dah! No pictures... Very clever.

Anyway, I WILL try put it up tomorrow. Heheh.

Class morning was okay. So far, none of my students actually died from my acidic tongue (signs of better times ahead?) yet. Hahaha... But really, if you want to test your patience to the limits, try to teach End-user computing (Basic stuffs about the products Bill Gates produce: MS Word, Excel, Access, etc.) to the First Years. You'll either;

(a) Grit your teeth and keep repeating the first thing you said to them 'cause they can't get it past their thick skull
(b) Very tempted to smash their head but since you can't you try your hardest to smile
(c) Couldn't bother smiling so you'll frown/scowl instead
(d) All of the above

Hahah...

On the other hand, I'm swamped by my assignments. Hmm... Let's see, There that 10-page essay, 15-page Essay, 10-page case study, 5-page article reviews, and I'm just starting to do some of it. Anyone care to help me here??? Anyone??

Gotta surf the net for articles. Anyone can find articles regarding "Strategic Human Resource Planning Issues" and "Strategic Human Resource Management Issues"... Please please please email me or notify me. Thanks :)

ANNOUNCEMENT

In view of the current situation (classes-weather-assignments-projects-health), I hereby announces to no one in particular that I may or may not be able to blog everyday. Weather and health-permitting, I'll be here in the lab. If not, heheh, tidur kot since I'll be burning the midnight oil.

Also as you may know, Chris is the BIGGEST pemalas, laziest bum and slacker extraordinaire, so Chris is only being... um...Chris. heheh. C'mon lah, my house quite far from campus and I have to WALK. (okay, okay, not THAT far lah, but still, walking in the hot sun is definitely not what I have in mind.) So, unless I have a chauffeur to drive me around, I'll be in the lab when I feel like walking (or I have to). To have any idea how hard it is for me to walk to uni, try watch Garfield the movie. "Can't walk... (gasp) Reach physical limits (wheeze)...Need to go back...". Hahahaha...

Well, I gotta go. Slept at 2 am last nite and up at 6.30 am. Bye =)

See u tomorrow and I'll post my latest pics. (I think la) hehehe...

TRIP... to UNIMAS Clinic

Went to see the Doctor again today. Concerned about the frequency of my stomach pain (no, it's not gastrics). The pain is situated at my bottom left abdomen. it's so intense that I'll only be able to curl and sweats. plus, i'll be having a bit of nausea (no, it's not food poisoning a.k.a. salah makan). Parents, friends and me, myself are concerned that it might be appendicitis (Tak nakkkk). And last night I had another episode while I was getting ready to go to class. Nasib baik, Dr Hong, my lecturer, was so kind to excuse me from the class. Thanks Dr Hong! Kesian Mum & Dad, so concerned and risau. I'm ok, really.

So this morning I went to see the Doc. The diagnosis... Aaa.. I'm not sure. The Doc said that it might be my kidney acting up (on whatever reasons I may never know) or cramps. As for the swelling(biji) under my chin (Did I mention this?), the Doc said that it might be due to infection at my lymph nodes. ( Actually, susah sikit nak paham Doctor sorang nih... Bukan dia nak explain sangat kat kita. Kalau Doc sorang lagi, best arr... Dia explain semua)

After all, same ol' thing. Sheesh, seems that I am a frequent visitor to the clinic. How I wish I had better health than having these complaints. But then living is better than anything, isn't it?

WHAT I PROMISED

Well, I promised to update about my trip since Monday. But been busy (read: malas) I spent yesterday at home. =). This post is a very, very simplified version of what happened during the trip. I'll tell you more when I feel like telling more, okay?

Actually the trip was really fun. I honestly think I will definitely be going to Mt. Singai again. With its beautiful scenery full of tranqulity, I felt so peaceful there. Rasa macam tak nak balik je.

This trip really helped me in overcoming all the problems that I've faced recently and put my life into focus again. There's that problem with a failed relationship, this problem with my education fees, with si anu and that polan, and the list went on. This trip has taught me to let go of all this problem, to put my faith in THE BIG MAN up above. Not an easy feat for a chronic worrier, I tell you.

In one of the sessions that we called "Malam Perdamaian", I made peace with all the skeletons in my closet (Man, I sure do have a lot of skeletons stored in there). I made peace with the person who broke my heart. I made peace with people who've hurt me; families, friends. I've even made peace with the other party involved in breaking my heart. Thanks to my dear, dear friend/'brother' ChrisL for lending me your shoulders to cry on during these sessions. You're a gem, dude.

And then the night was continued by a concert. I performed as one of the lead singers (mesti tak percaya nih) for my campus' performance. I actually helped in writing the two songs that we performed that night. Heehee. It was fun to see the other participants enjoying our performance.

During the AGM held the next morning. I was elected as the Vice-President of GPK (Gabungan Pelajar Kristian). Quite a task for me. And not to mention being even more busy than I already am. To my friends; this means even more limited time to spend with all of you but somehow, we'll make up for it, yah?

Well, with new responsibilities mean more expectations placed on me. I just hope and try my best to strike a balance and not having to sacrifice anything. Just trying to do my best in serving the BIG MAN up above.

So there you go... An update on my trip. Kinda mental block at the moment. Will add anything when I feel like it.

I'M TIRED

I'm back from my weekend trip to Mt. Singai. It was fun but after the descent, aiya, very tired lah.

The trip was fun and the waters in singai, ahhh... icy cold and very refreshing. Sure miss the atmosphere there.

Want to write more, but I'm in class at the moment. Will update tomorrow.

&%#$!@#$#E%

Ladies & Gentlemen, this is gonna be a long rant. So if you are of the faint-hearted, proceed no more. If you're in need of a good beating, please step forward. I really need to break someone's head at the moment. Click below to read all of it.

RANT:

WHAT THE BLOODY F**K ARE YOU DOING?!

WHERE'S YOUR BLOODY MIND?! I SENT THAT CLAIM LAST MONTH AND NOW ONLY YOU TELL ME THAT IT'S BLOODY NO CAN DO?! THAT I ONLY CAN CLAIM NEXT MONTH SINCE YOU WAITED TILL THE LAST DAY TO TELL ME?!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE F**KED UP SYSTEM HERE?!

WHY DIDN'T YOU BLOODY TELL ME EARLIER THAT ANOTHER FORM IS NEEDED?!

BY THE WAY, YOU GAVE ME THAT BLOODY PIECE OF S**T FORM ANYWAY IN THE 1ST PLACE!!!

I'M SICK OF THIS SCREWED UP SYSTEM!

I'M TIRED OF HAVING TO WAIT AS IF I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO! IN AN AGE OF SPEED AND EFFICIENCY, YOU PREFER TO DWELL IN THE STONE AGE??! OH HELL, MAYBE THE STONE AGE PEOPLE ARE EVEN BETTER THAN YOU!

I HOPE YOU ROT IN ETERNAL UNCEASING PILE OF S**T THAT YOU CALL WORK!!!

Rationale behind the Rant:

I sent my payment claim form last month as I am working as a lab demonstrator in this shitty place. THEY said I've used the wrong form. But THEY gave me the wrong form. My colleague used the wrong form. But my colleague got her $$. WTF?!

THEY could've notified me about it. But instead, THEY chose to let me know only when I went to get my cheque. And... THEY prefer to pass the shit to one party after another, hoping that the shit will disappear.

I've heard of lousy service... But THIS definitely requires a new word to describe it. Lousy is WAAAYYY BETTER than THIS!!!!!

RESOLUTION:

I'M NEVER GONNA WORK HERE AS DEMO EVER AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS F**KING SYSTEM KILLS!!!

NEW PIC

Itchy fingers again...

Changed the header pic with a new one. Kinda hated the old one with my 'sepet' eyes. Ugh...

Twiddled some images with Microsoft Image Composer (1st time using. I like!). So the result ----> as proven above. Heheheh...

In other words, Lab life is very unproductive today.

KUCHING, SARAWAK & MALAYSIA - FICTION / FACTS

** Just something fwded by a friend. Very funny =)

The FICTION

1. Hey, you Sarawak people live in trees? (* I do get this a lot from the ignoramus out there)
YES, we have elevators too...they're really an engineering feat because it's not easy to fit an elevator into a tree.

2. You guys got electric?
Yes, but since cost of transmission is too high due to the geographic barriers, we use independent solar panels and mini turbines scattered all around, they are exactly 30,000 of them!

3. Over there got what car?
We ride wild boar. When the plane arrives at the airport, we take our wild boar and ride it all the way to our tree house.

4. Got road?
No, just jungle trails and a few roads around town.

5. You Ibans still potong kepala?
Yes, we are head hunters. Human brain is the best food. (*I used to get asked this question a lot when I first went to Semenanjung, It used to piss me off but after a while, I kinda pity those poor ignorant souls. Good answer there!)

6. Sarawak is inside Sabah right? (*I wonder what did they get for their Geography?)
No, we are one state, you idiot. Sabah is a town in Sarawak. (* Just joking!)

7. Eh? Sabah and Sarawak not same?
Yes! How many times I have to tell u Sabah is a town in Sarawak.

8. Kuching big?
So-so la...but we have the largest population of stray cats in a city in the world, about 40,000! Why do you think the city is called Kuching.

9. Kuching got many cats la...
YES LA! How many times I have to say?

10. Kuching got Malay?
Duh'… (* Double Duh')

11. Sarawak people can speak English?
No, but we can speak French because we were colonized by the French in the 18th century and then by the aliens in the 19th century, so our local dialect is pretty much based on some alien language that nobody understands. (* Huahahahaha!!!!)

12. Kuching got airport or you use boat go Johor?
Kuching airport is only fit for a Fokker. Since a Fokker cant go so far, we have to use a steamboats, no joking! Steam boat, because Sarawak is so full of timber. Its cheaper than diesel or any other petrol

The REAL FACT (SERIOUSLY)

1. The only state to be ruled by a white Rajah.

2. Sarawak is the largest state in Malaysia.

3. Sarawak supports whole of Malaysia with its own economy (PAY ATTENTION HERE EVERYONE). Now you know how generous Sarawak is! Without Sarawak, there won't be Putrajaya or KLCC. (* I mean Wahhhh!!! I must check this )

4. Sarawak population is 2,176,800. Kuching alone has 458,300 (7th most populated city in Malaysia).

5. There are 27 ethnic groups that speak 45 different languages and dialects.

6. Kuching International Airport hosts a number of direct international flights.

7. Kuching is the most livable city in Malaysia and the 7th most livable city in the world. Even KL is behind at 12th place.

FACT (LIGHTER SIDE)

1. We have electricity

2. In Kuching, we see Mercedes Benz till we want to puke. WE ARE rich people! Honestly, in just one family, the minimum we had are 2 cars.

3. Our guys are handsome and chicks are hot! Very hot!

4. The size of Sarawak is the equivalent of...umm...umm...the size of...umm...big la! (Almost the size of Semenanjung Malaysia, about 124,449.51 square km).

5. Kuching is one of the best cities to live around!

6. Sarawakians are the BEST! *grin*grin*

7. We got lots of good food; Sarawak Laksa, Pansuh Manok, Sarawak Kolo Mee, Chicken Rice, Belacan Beehoon, Bidin & Paku stir fried with belacan and many more.

A SLACKER EXTRAORDINAIRE'S LIFE PHILOSOPHY

1. Never put off tomorrow what u can put off the day after tomorrow
2. Why do it now when you can do it tomorrow

AND THE WINNER:

"Esok masih ada (There is still tomorrow)"

MY (very) UNPRODUCTIVE MERDEKA DAY

As predicted, my Merdeka Day ends up being very unproductive. Slept till 3 pm (I went to sleep at 7.30 am). Spent Merdeka eve doing crisis management to avoid any bloodbath between two of my friends (started as a small thing but escalates into something big... All hot air) and stayed up all night chatting with a few friends.

*Oh yeah, TmTouch really sucks!!! I couldn't make calls from 30th August - 1st September. So people, no Merdeka wishes for korang lah ni. *

After wake up at 3 pm, went to junior's place, langkah kanan so get to makan lah... hehehe

Went back and cook chicken soup. Yummy!

Housemates return from climbing Mt. Santubong. Very tired. My roomie macam dying and making lots of noise so gave her a good 'sounding'- am really not in the mood to layan anyone's over-mengada-ness (over-reacting). I mean, it's not as if people put a gun to your head to force you to go and climb the mountain. You went on your own free will. So stop whining and bitching and just shut up and SLEEP! Ahhh... Felt better.

So there you go, my totally unproductive Merdeka Day =). How's yours?

DUAL EXISTENCE

Just posting a question a friend asked me during Merdeka...

Can Friendship exist together with Love?

or

Is it mutually exclusive (i.e: Can't exist
together)?

There are few ways to interpret this question.

1. Friendship and love with the same person, i.e: A
2. Friendship with A; and Love with B

How may Friendship and Love exist together without jealousy rearing its ugly head?

Just asking for your 2-Cents worth...

MERDEKA

MERDEKA!!!

Not only because it's the National Day but also finally free from my mid-term assesments.

But sadly, am still not free from the bulk of my assignments that I need to finish before end of the term. *Yark*

This saturday will be awwwaaayyy again. Hehehe *grin*grin*

Tomorrow cuti... Hmmm.. Where will I be? Maybe playing beach volleyball in Damai or simply 'lepak' at home watching VCDs or lame shows on TV... Nonetheless, a very unproductive Merdeka Holiday.

Here's to your Holiday...

AS I WONDER

Why do we sacrifice what we wants to compromise with what others want?

Why do we hold back from saying what is the obvious truth in order to keep others happy in their illusions?

Isn't it more humane to jolt them from their illusions to face the reality?

Hmm... sorta reminds me of the Matrix.

What say you???

Edit: Ah???! No opinion arr???? Hallo??? Anyone there???

PROBLEM SOLVER, SUPERHERO(ine), WORLD SAVER, WHATEVER

Am currently in a headjam...

Sometimes things just make me wonder, what makes most people think I can sort out their mess?

There's a rather unpleasant 'situation' in my house. So 'one' came and complained to me about 'other' punya perangai (i won't give the details here).

So what did I do?

I listened...

Thought about it...

Give my opinions...

In the end, it's still up to 'one' to figure it out. I can't do much since it's between 'one' and 'other'.

Unless things got out of hand, I'll let them sort it themselves. Otherwise, I'll just have to call a 'persidangan'. *sigh*

Then, there's 'another' who only contact me whenever she is in a 'jam'. Talk about abusing a friendship huh?

And there's countless others who moans/complains/whines about whatever-problems-under-the-sun. Sheesh...

And I am supposed to draw my magic wand and swish and swash it all awaaaay..... Yeah right... If only I can do that lah...

And it's very ANNOYING when these people asks for your opinion/help, but only to do apa dia suka. when it doesn't work out, comes back to me... and it starts all over again

And when I give my opinion, dismiss it by saying

"aiya Chris, so easy for you to say lah. Not you mah"

You're damn right. It's not ME, it's YOU! and shouldn't you be trying to find your own solution. I am a practical person and so my decisions will be deeply rooted in logic, to hell with jaga anyone's hati. If they can't face the truth, then tell them to bury their head in the sand lah!

Sheesh... Grow up!!!

BURNT!!!

When: Saturday

Where: KS Swimming Pool

Time: 1500 - 1830 hours

What the heck happened???

I went for my usual routine which is swimming. I usually swim at least twice a week. Since I was rather busy lately with classes and whatnots, I missed a few sessions. Been disappointing my swimming buddies... So, last saturday I lepas geram lah.

I went swimming with my usual swimming buddies; Pian, (Adji couldn't make it) *Iley, *Mel & *Mon (* are not regular members but on invitation basis. hehehe. But I guess some will be regular members since some dunno how to swim... heheh).

So bila dah kemaruk sangat nak swimming, we went very early. 3 pm! Wah, under the hot sun some more! After half an hour, my skin starts to turn into a sexy (?!) reddish hue a la lobster. What did I do? Nah, Don't care.

Balik rumah, huhuhu.... Then only start to fret... Red is not that sexy, not when it is guaranteed that it will turn into a burnt hue... Argh!!!! Time tu la start sibuk2 sapu losyen... (Lesson: Never forget your sunblock, kids!)

So right now, am stuck with a zebra/tapir skin. Berbelang-belang... hahahha... Maybe I shud have worn a bikini, then it'll be (almost) all over tan/(hangus)... Heheheh... (Dalam mimpi lah tu...huahuahua)

But then, I don't give a care...

This evening will be swimming again... Yay!

HOUSE OF FLYING DAGGERS

Finally went to watch HOFD with the usual 'Movie Gang' since last night's class was cancelled by my lecturer... so yippee yay! heheheh... Also went swimming (finally!) after missing the weekly sessions since classes (Mon, Wed & Fri) and teaching (Thurs).

aiyakks... off track pulak...

Went at 8 pm. As usual Pian will pick Adji & I up to go to Riverside. Met with Man & his Mem there. Adji was complaining bout his tummy upset... kesian... Sampai2 je kat Riverside, rushed to Guardian Pharmacy to buy 'Pil Chi Kit Teck Aun'... hehehe...

Watched the 9.15 pm show. Wasn't really putting high expectations since been reading the reviews. I am a fan of Zhang Yi Mou films. Red Sorghum, Not One Less, Hero, you name it... Zhang's movie will give your eyes a feast with wonderful colours and scenery. (Who can forget the scene where Zhang Zi Yi duels with Maggie Cheung with golden leaves swirling around them?)

The review somehow warned me not to put my expectations up high... IMO, HOFD seems to be too commercial rather than the artsy movie that Zhang Yi Mou made. The cinematography and direction still have the touch/caress of Zhang Yi Mou- the perfect lights, scenes, colours. Maybe Zhang Yi Mou is pressured to get on the commercial bandwagon post-Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon (Rimau membongkok, Naga bertapok...hehehhe).

The scenery will take your breath away, the fantastic use of colours, and the action will simply blow your mind. But the story, bleeekk.... Ntahapapa... Sorta get the feeling that this is a Hindi movie only it's in Chinese and minus the golek-golek kat bukit scenes. Sometimes I half expected them to suddenly sampai kat Swiss ke, kat Egypt ke... (One of the scenes where Zi Yi leads Takeshi)

Yang memang unbelievable lah, ada scene yang surely you will "aik?! Tak mati-mati jugak dia nih".

But Takeshi & Zi Yi are a feast to look at... Yummy... heheh

But hey, it's a good show. Watch it, just don't expect too high with this one. Feast your eyes.

Oh, btw, Mr Zhang... Next time don't disappoint us with stories a la Hindi movies. If I wanted to watch mindless romance movies, I'll watch Hindi movies. Stick to what you do best, which is mind-stimulating movies.

SOME THINGS I LEARNED AFTER 24 YEARS OF LIVING... PART 2

$h!T.....

I actually wrote a post but the b!00dY blogger stupid $h!T... now I have to write another b!oodY post!!!

Here goes... *trying very hard to refresh memory with limited retrieval capacity*

1. LOVE IS BLIND (Where you look beyond the differences & flaws of your partner. Kira unconditional love lah ni)



2. LOVE BLINDNESS CAN BE CURED ( When the differences & flaws slaps you back to reality. Welcome back to earth!)



3. AGE IS A STATE OF MIND (It's all in your head)



4. My parents still thinks I'm twelve *sigh*



5. Take care of the golf balls first



6. PAIN GIVES STRENGTH & ENDURANCE



7. LAUGH & BE HAPPY (sheesh... sounds cheesy or wat?)



8. I can be a scary sight... (Definitely when lack of sleep, NO COFFEE or one too many person piss me off... I HAVE VERY LIMITED PATIENCE)



9. I'm a REBEL (with a cause)



10. People are as multi-layered as a Matrushka Doll ( There's always another shell under that shell).

... to be continued (I hope this turn out ok... If not, double fark!!!)

SOME THINGS I LEARNED AFTER 24 YEARS OF LIVING... PART 1

After living, breathing etc. for more than 24 years, these are the stuffs that I learned after experiencing and observing things around me. Some of the lessons I've learnt are:

1. Some friends may use and abuse you



2. Long Distance Relationship never work (unless both are persistent/committed/trustworthy, yadda...yadda... only works in IDEAL CASE (read: uh, not in reality) scenario )



3. Inter-Cultural Romantic Relationship is difficult to work out (unless you are absof**kingly devoted to each other. i.e: LOVE IS BLIND THINGY ala Hindi Movie).



4. (some) Men couldn't be trusted



5. A normal girl/guy friend can be the next girlfriend/boyfriend. ( Take the step when you are really sure it will work out. cause if it didn't, it will never be the same, ever)



6. Beware of your guy's/girl's best friend. (Sh*t! I ignored a friend's advice on this. Look what it did to me)



7. Don't ever change for anyone. I am who I am. If ppl don't like it, tell 'em to shove it somewhere the sun don't shine...



8. Don't give any s**t of care to anyone who doesn't deserve it



9. Love, lust, whatever... it always ends with pain



10. Some things that ends, are better ended than started in the first place

I need a break!!!

THE ROOM

17 year old Brian Moore was asked to write something about Heaven in school. It was his best essay; it literally stunned his class.

But sadly, it was also his last. He was killed in a car accident on May 27, 1997. His parents pinned essay in the living room. "I think God used him to make a point. I think we were meant to find it and make something out of it, " Mrs. Moore said of the essay. She and her husband want to share their son's vision of life after death. "I'm happy for Brian. I know he's in heaven. I know I'll see him.

Brian's Essay: The Room...

In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room. There were no distinguishing features except for the one wall covered with small index card files. They were like the ones in libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endless in either direction, had very different headings.

As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read "Girls I have liked." I opened it and began flipping through the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written on each one. And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was.

This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my life. Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and small, in a detail my memory couldn't match. A sense of
wonder and curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. Some brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret so intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching.

A file named "Friends" was next to one marked "Friends I have betrayed." The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird. "Books I Have Read," "Lies I Have Told," "Comfort I have Given," "Jokes I Have Laughed at." Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: "Things I've yelled at my brothers."

Others I couldn't laugh at: "Things I Have Done in My Anger", "Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents." I never ceased to be surprised by the contents. Often there were many
more cards than I expected. Sometimes fewer than I hoped. I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived. Could it be possible that I had the time in my years to fill each of these thousands or even millions of cards?

But each card confirmed this truth. Each was written in my own handwriting. Each signed with my signature.

When I pulled out the file marked "TV Shows I have watched", files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't found the end of the file. I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of shows but more by the vast time I
knew that each file represented.

When I came to a file marked "Lustful Thoughts," I felt a chill run through my body. I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test its size, and drew out a card. I shuddered at its detailed content. I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded. An almost animal rage broke on me. One thought dominated my mind: No one must ever see these cards! No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy them!" In insane frenzy I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter now. I had to empty it and burn the cards. But as I took it at one end and began pounding it on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card. I became desperate and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as steel when I tried to tear it.

Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. Leaning my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying sigh. And then I saw it.. The title bore "People I Have Shared the Gospel With." The handle was brighter than those around it, newer, almost unused. I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three inches long fell into my hands. I could count the cards it contained on one hand. And then the tears came.I began to weep. Sobs so deep that they hurt. They started in my stomach and shook through me. I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of shame, from the overwhelming shame of it all. The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must ever, ever know of this room. I must lock it up and hide the key. But then as I
pushed away the tears, I saw Him.

No, please not Him. Not here. Oh, anyone but Jesus. I watched helplessly as He began to open the files and read the cards. I couldn't bear to watch His response. And in the moments I could
bring myself to look at His face, I saw a sorrow deeper than my own. He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes. Why did He have to read every one? Finally He turned and looked at me from across the room. He looked at me with pity in His eyes.

But this was a pity that didn't anger me. I dropped my head, covered my face with my hands and began to cry again. He walked over and put His arm around me. He could have said so many things. But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me.

Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files. Starting at one end of the room, He took out a file and, one by one, began to sign His name over mine on each card. "No!" I shouted rushing to Him. All I could find to say was "No, no," as I pulled the card from Him. His name shouldn't be on these cards. But there it was, written in red so rich, so dark, so alive.

The name of Jesus covered mine. It was written with His blood. He gently took the card back. He smiled a sad smile and began to sign the cards.

I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly, but the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file and walk back to my side. He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, "It is finished." I stood up, and He led me out of the room. There was no lock on its door.

There were still cards to be written.

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."-Phil. 4:13


"For God so loved the world that He gave His only son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life."

If you feel the same way spread it to as many people as you can so the love of Jesus will touch their lives also. My "People I shared the gospel with" file just got bigger, how about yours?

MONSTER RETURNS

My lab will be closed for exhibition during the convocation week. Argh!!! Damn!

Not that I am pissed off becoz of it but the way some people told me.

"Are you master student?!" *with high-pitched voice*
(of course I'm a master student, you moron... Do u think I saja2 masuk buat selamba in Master lab???)

"This lab is closed, we're using it for the exhibition"

$hiT!!!

Come on lah, I masuk lab baru nak bagi tau. I know you're a *toot* but say it nicely (manners... manners... ). A little apology thrown in would be nice. Don't you bl**dy know that you're actually causing lots of inconvenience to me??!! Kalau nak close lab ni pun, inform me earlier lah.

Okay, maybe I'm over-reacting... But face it, telling bad news in a bad way to a sleep-deprived person and expect them to take it easy, it's like standing in the middle of the PLUS-highway and expecting everyone to bagi laluan. Yeah, right. I'm no saint okay... U give me dirt, I'll give you that and more...

So yeah, I'm rude. so what? At least I'm selectively rude. at the right person.

and oh yeah, don't mess with me when i didn't have enough sleep. I can be a monster.

p/s: wanted to have lunch with a friend. cancelled. shit! fine! seems like everyone is testing the limits of my limited patience... GRRR!!!!!!

DAD, MUM & ME

Do you think i look similar to my dad or my mum?

I ikut muka sapa??? heheh...

IN CLASS

In class at the moment. Statistics and SPSS.

Feel sleepy. Can't open eyes. feel heavy. very drowsy...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......

NEW SHOUTBOX

I've switched to using shoutbox. Bangga sebab developer dia org Sarawak jugak. Heheheh...

Credits n thanks to Junaidix for the shoutbox.

FUN WEEKEND (SUNDAY)

Went to St. Joseph for Mass. Met member lama from CSSUKM days. Met UiTM YCG ppl.

Chatted with Br. Jeffry (Jeremy?) frm St. Peter's College (SPC). Br. J, thanks for the kopi kaw2... hehehe... Br. J, Br. Phillip... Thanks for the compliments. It's my way of expressing my worship.

The UNICS gang had lunch with 2 Brothers (Seminarians) frm SPC (forgot their names... heheh.. Sorry Bro... ). Thanks to Chris.T for being my banker for the day.

After Fellowship meeting went to makan2. Met member lama frm undergrad years n lepak2. Pian Janggut bought a camera phone for only RM500. Hahaha... Played around with it. Cool... So now how? I wan a samsung but terpikat pulak with that phone.... argh!!!!

A fren called at 2.46 am. I was like, what the $%^%?!!! ( Sapa suruh call tgh aku syok tido?) Sorry la kawan, 3 times u dtg Kch, 3 times oso lah u didn't jumpa me... heheh. Next time maybe...

FUN WEEKEND (SATURDAY)

Had a fun Saturday. Went to Gabungan Pelajar Kristian (GPK) Concert in St. Peter's College. My campus in charge of the food & drinks stall as well as performing for praise & worship sing-along.

Lots of fun during the praise & worship session. Got lots of compliments for our dance routine. Thanks UNICS gang for being sporting enuff... Heheheh...

Hmmm... Thinking of joining the GPK retreat in September in Mt. Singai. We'll see bout that (if no class ok lah). Might be involved as one of the dancers.

Arrived home at 11.30 pm. Dead tired. Mandi. Hit the bed and instantly zzzzzzzzzzzzz........

UNDELIVERED???

Ever wondered where your "lost" mail ended OR how it got "lost" in the first place??? Read this.

Grrr...

SPONGEBRAIN

I have a huge headache... Actually been having this persistent headache for quite sometime already... Sort of an on-off thingy. But lately I realized that I've been experiencing it more frequently... And yesterday was an exceptional example of one of a grand proportion. And I mean GRAND (read: HUGE)

I woke up with a throbbing pain in my head. I took a shower, nope, didn't help. I took deep breaths, nope, didn't help either. I didn't take any meds coz I thought that it will cease. Man, I was so dead wrong. I went to uni, I had things to attend to (lecturers, projects, yadda, yadda). I stayed inside the lab to do my work when I felt that the pain escalates into something bigger.

My reaction: Ignore the pain. It will go away.

Hohohoh... The pain wouldn't go away. I went back early at about 4.30 pm (I got lecture at 7.00 pm). The walk back home was a torture. Felt ter'awang-awangan' (I'm floating!!!) and blurry eyed.

When I reached home, I threw up. Yeah, it was that bad. Asked Lin to urut my head (Oh, please...please... make the pain go away...). Ah, relief...

My housemates were all against the idea of me going to class (What if you pengsan/muntah/die/etc???). So I stayed at home. Took my bath and rest. Then...

WHAM!!! The headache returns... My brain felt like a sponge being squeezed n unsqueezed. That's it!!! I'm declaring war against my headache. I went to bed, swallowed painkiller strong enough to numb a horse and slept. like a log.

Woke up today, minus a headache... =)

So today I will be meeting my Doc again (hmm... been meeting her regularly on weekly basis) and let her figure out what is wrong.

OR

I can trade-in my headaches... Any takers?Anyone? aaannnyyyyooonnnee???

(Right now u must be thinking, Wah, my headache sure very dahsyat until it affects my cognition... Yeah, you are right... now I can read minds... Hahahaha!!! o_O )

Hmm... gotta go buy my lunch now... so I can threw it all up later
... Tata....

I CAN'T UNDERSTAND THIS!!!

This violence is insane! When will all this mindless violence cease? When will everyone starts to accept the differences and focus on the similarities. They hate the Americans, Britons, Israelis, etc., BUT WHY KILL THE CHRISTIANS???? What have they done to deserve this? Is it because of their faith?! America also have Moslems, Buddhists, Hindus, etc. Do this mean that they will bomb a mosque, temple or kuil next?!

You worship God, I worship God... So, where's the Godliness of these actions???

God is love, to love is to serve God.

Don't get me wrong here... I'm not judging anyone by their religion... To me, everyone is free to practise their faith. I just can't accept the violence that is bred by ignorance/extremism be it by a Christian or others.

RANDOM THOTS

Reading the news online when some headlines caught my eyes.

Reading this, how I wished they thought of it while I was in my undergraduate years... *sigh*

and this, serves as a warning to anyone yang berminat nak having vertical tango dalam kereta (read: "kereta rosak"). Beware!!! Hehehe...

This tribute to a loved one brings tears to my eyes and I greatly admire their strength and faith in this tragedy. I can't imagine how I will survive if I lost my loved ones.

Grudge kills.

I want to watch this and this.

I need coffee... Teaching TMX is stressful...

p/s: I know I promised a post about Singai Retreat... But too busy... Will write soon... I promise =)

THIS IS SO FREAKY!

Visit this site... You'll know just what I mean.

THE MAYONNAISE JAR & COFFEE

Got this thru e-mail. Very inspiring. Wanna go get a cuppa?  

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the coffee.  

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full.  

They agreed that it was.  

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.  

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes".  

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognise that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things — your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favourite passions — things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car. The sand is everything else — the small stuff.  

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18 holes. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.   Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."  

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.  

The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

THE DAY AFTER

I'm tired but exhilarated. Singai is soooo beautiful and peaceful.

Met a lot of new friends

Had so much fun

not forgetting 'the Matrix' stunt =)

AWAY FOR THE WEEKEND

Another 3 hour + I'll be going for my Retreat trip To Mt. Singai in Bau. Jointly organised by UiTM and Campus Ministry of St. Joseph Cathedral, the 2-days, 2-nights retreat will hopefully serve as an occasion for me to reflect again on the meaning and purpose of my life - the journey that I've had from birth, through youth, and  towards maturity. How am I progressing? Am I on course or is there a need for a change in direction? In the end, I hope for deeper conversion and renewal of my spiritual life.

Looking forward to a weekend filled with enlightenment and refreshment of the soul. Plus, the much needed exercise of trekking up the mountain.

Have a fun filled weekend. Take care all.

LOVE OF MY LIFE

Everyone have that someone we can call the love of our life. Whether its our parents, partners, spouse, sibling, offspring, friend, whatever. These are the people that you'll miss when they're not there and their presence can make your heart go all warm & fuzzy. Merely listening to their voice could give you this warm, fuzzy feeling.  
I have some people I can call the love of my life.

1. My parents 
   What more is there to say? They raised me up, sickly brat and all, and shaped me into what I am today. Although at that moment I never quite comprehend why they did all that they did, I've realized that it's for my own good (though it's hard to accept at that time lah).  Through all the years, I've came to realize just how many sacrifices that they've made just to accomodate my needs. Thank you Mom & Dad.
   


2. My close Friends
   These are my friends who I can rely on to provide accurate feedback. They will not gloss it all up, wrap, ribboned and all. They will give the naked truth, barbs and all. Painful but nonetheless, the truth. They are also people I can ring up at 2 a.m. to tell them 'bout that tummy ache I have. These are people who will be there for me, rain or shine. There for the laughters and also for the tears. Thank you dear friends, you know who you are.


3. A very Significant Other
   This person occupies a very special place in my heart. Who serenades me with songs in every phonecall. Who loves and adores me unconditionally. Who will whisper sweet nonsensical nothings in my ears. And make no mistake, she's just barely three years old. Heheh... Whaddaya thinking? huh? huh? She's my niece, Chechen la. (Laaa... Ingatkan sapa tadi.hehehe). She's the one who brightens me with her smile and stories. Her innocence reminds me that there is still something good and beautiful in this ugly world. And I kid you not, sometimes children can see the obvious answers that we as grown-ups usually overlook. Ah, the refreshing innocence of a child. Brings a smile to your face and also to your heart.

There you go. The love of my life. How about yours?

PRAYERS & FAITH

Dear readers,
 
Please pray for the safety of the people involved in the missing helicopter in Ba Kelalan, Sarawak. 
 
Pray also for their family for the strength they need in dealing in this trying time and that they not lose hope.
 
Remember also those involved in the search-and-rescue operations, may they always be safe. May God guide and protect everyone involved.
 
Amen.
 
Click Here for current news.

WHAT I DID DURING WEEKEND

1. Sleep. Not that I'm deprived of sleep but maybe due to the medication.
2. Read 'Free to Pray, Free to Love' by Max Ovila. Good book. Still reading it.
3. Laundry (Bedsheets etc.). Wash the 'heavy2' things I don't wash on normal days.
4. Fellowship at the Catholic Ministry House.
5. Watch TV.

Anyway, not really an interesting weekend. 

Also I realized that I simply hated it when some people are adamantly childish (selfish) when their demands are not met. I'm not saying "NO!" ,period, but "NO, NOT NOW!". Hmpphh... So much for being a grown-up when the child within still rules the action. Do everyone a favour and grow up.

BEWARE OF (the) CAT

Yeah, yeah... I know I promised to tell you about how my cat terrorized the people back home but I haven't got the time or mood to write about it. So, here goes...

I like cats. Once I owned about twenty cats. Yes, I did. But now, sadly since I am away from home, I only have 3 left at home with my nieces as surrogate owners. A male ginger-n-white cat we called Adub (don't ask. It's the name my niece gave the cat), male black-n-white cat I call Ciku a.k.a. Kucing Emas Aunty (my niece's nickname to this cat) and a female multi-color 'katik/serama' ('cause tak besar2) we call Ngiiiik .


The one that terrorizes my family is Ciku. Ciku a.k.a. the Golden Cat is kept in a cage and normally brought out for exercices and playtime in the house. The main reason that Ciku is kept in the cage is due to his tendency to be rather violent while playing (he's hyper) and the fact that some of my cats were stolen before. Why did Ciku turned violent, err.. I don't know for sure... But there's been incidents when Ciku did scared me sh**less.

Once was when he was let into the house to play in one of the spare bedrooms. He was playing with a ball and I was reading a book on the daybed. Suddenly, Ciku jumped on the bed, pounced at my leg and bit me. Shocked, I threw a pillow at him. He released his bite but started to attack the pillow (sorta like kena possesed). Man, I was soooo scared.

This time It happened to my Dad. Ciku escaped from the cage ( Actually I told Dad that Ciku's cage needs repairs but Dad told me he'll see to it when he got the time) and was excited/agitated as hell for a fight with a stray cat. Bro No.2 called Dad and asking Dad to get Ciku as he's also scared of Ciku. Dad was going to get Ciku when he saw the state Ciku was in and decided that there's no way he can get Ciku, the cat was really on edge. So Dad turned around to get back into the house when suddenly, Ciku pounced from behind, bit him at his calf and wouldn't release for what seemed to be an eternity. Dad whacked Ciku (in self-defence) and finally, Ciku let go and ran into the kitchen.

Poor Dad. He had to be sent to the clinic for injection and clean the wound (I got an earful and much more from Mum because of this. Ciku being my cat and so his actions are my responsibility).

Back at home, no one dared to go to the kitchen in fear of Ciku. Quoting Dad, "Macam Hang Jebat bermaharajalela kat Istana Melaka pulak". Hehehe... Dad still have his humour intact despite being in pain. Mum forgot that Ciku was in the kitchen and went to get something, when she realized that she's in the 'dangerous' zone. Despite her pain in the leg, Mum managed to hobble quickly out of the kitchen (best time for the day!). Since no one dared to go into the kitchen, who else but the resident super-savior of the house a.k.a. Dad to get it.

Dad was rather scared that Ciku will 'attack' him again and so, he went slowly and with stealth into the kitchen. Alas, Ciku sensed his presence and stood up on the kitchen table (in normal circumstances, under Mum's rule, this act is punishable by a HUGE whack on the said creature's head/rump). Dad's heart starts to beat faster (Thump!Thump!). Ciku jumped down from the table and walks slowly and deliberately nearer and nearer to Dad. Suddenly, he jumps and dives to Dad's feet and starts to golek-golek (rolling around). Aicheh... So suspen only...

Dad put him back into the cage and the next day released Ciku from the cage. Maybe Ciku tension stay inside the cage kot.

Btw, when Dad told me 'bout this thru the phone, I can't help but almost break down in giggles. Why, I kept remembering the scene from Shrek 2 where Puss bit Shrek. Hahaha!

CALLS, CALLS, CALLS

Had two surprise phone calls early this morning. One from my 'Khang ko-ko' and another from my buddy, Busuk*. Was feeling rather miserable last night with the medication (Yearrrk!!!) and feeling sicky in general. Feeling rather bluesy and melancholic (side-effects from drugs kot?) and was reminiscing about past relationships and life in general with my housemate, Lynn. Yeah, blueishy mood is very infectious and so I find myself remembering fond (and some not-so-fond) memories from my past relationship.

I was getting ready to go to bed when I decided to miss call some of my friends (miss call here shows that u are missing these people and actually still ingat kat depa!). Then surprise...

The first person to call me was my 'Khang ko-ko'. He just came back from work and altho' feeling tired, he still have the energy to layan this insane adik. hehehe. Yakked on the phone for 1 hr and 15 mins. He updates me on the whats-going-ons back in Sibu and I cerita (complain is more like it) about whats-happening-here in Kuching. I told him about doc's visit, how my (demonic??) pet cat terrorizes my home in Bintangor (tell you 'bout this later) and bout life in general. Managed to kutuk him habis-habisan... Heheheh.. betcha miss the kutuk session eh, Khang... =) *grin*grin*

Anyway, Khang ko-ko definitely made my day. I feel so much better after a conversation with good ol' Khang. He always managed to lift up my spirits and leave this bubbly, pleasant feelings inside. heheh

After my yakking session with Khang ko-ko ended, I was getting ready for bed *yawn* and makan ubat (yearkkk!). Just about to doze off when another buddy called. So I picked it up and whaddayaknow... Busuk complaining about his tummy ache, info me that he'll be in Kch in August, loan stuff from MARA, etc. hehehe...not forgetting the usual kutuk therapy we always have. Also somethings about some girl who seem to lose interest already in their LDR (Long Distance Relationship). Hmmm... as I remember clearly I did bump into that girl with a guy in Kch's McD last Chinese New Year. Hopefully Busuk'll get over it soon. Anyway, all the best Busuk for your research =)

* Busuk (Smelly) is the nickname this friend and I use for each other. Not that we smell 'tho (No nasty B.O.s here). It's just a term of endearment we use. Hehehe

WAIT LAH, WAIT LAH, NOW SEE!!!!

I'm a real slacker when it comes to doing things like seeing the doctor, dentist, etc. I always have this thinking that " Never mind lah, see next day/week/month/year". But, after what the Doc told me today, I will make sure that next time, I'll be prompt in keeping my health in check.

I've been having blocked nose for a long time and have never given much thought to it. I was diagnosed as having sinus problems and given medication to control it. Lately, I've been having this discharge from the nasal cavities in my mouth that has a bad smell and taste. Eewww..... I wanted to see the Doctor earlier but knowing me... tau tau lah...

So today I finally decided to see the Doctor today after the discharge becomes more frequent and I can't even speak properly from my nasal congestion. The Doctor diagnosed my condition as Sinusitis ( read it here and here ) and wonders why I didn't come sooner as my condition is quite serious and my sinuses are infected.

"What?! Serious arr Doc???"
yeah, yeah, as if the Doc is joking... Hmm... Doesn't look like it [smiles sheepishly]

Then the bomb that jerks me into attention...

"This is quite serious as acute sinusitis can lead to brain infection."
What?! Ohmigosh... [calculating how long have this symptom happened, realized that few weeks already] My brain... my precious brain is in danger!!! Help!!!!

Now that she got my attention, the Doc proceeds to prescribe lots and lots of medication (ubat lagi), and lists what is the next course of treatment for my condition... which includes combination with other types of antibiotics and nasal puncture. (Nasal puncture? Sounds like they're gonna pop a hole or something...)

Called Dad to inform my condition. Kena lecture because of my tardiness in getting treatment... :( Ok Dad, I promise that in the future I will seek immediate treatment to any health issues I have (kalau ingat, hehe).

So, I will be meeting the Doc again next week... *sigh* Insaf lah macam ni... Tak nak tangguh2 lagi lain kali. In the mean time, makan ubat lah lagi....