Teacher Talk: Laugh Out Loud Wednesday

I think I've never laughed this hard since back-breaking July started. Students, you surely made me smile and tickled pink today. I'll remember this day for a long long time, hell, maybe I'll tell my anak cucu about it one day.

Today was something that seems like it came from 'a series of unfortunate events' but in my case it was more like 'a series of hilariously funny events' (at least it was for me).

Read on...

Part 1
~walking down the stairs to go to the loo, saw the makcik cleaner and makcik kantin talking animatedly to each other

Me: Hi... Apa hal ya buk? (Hi... What is it aunty?)

MC: Nembiak luka cikgu. Tetikam pisuk kali tadik... (A kid suffered a cut teacher. Maybe accidentally cut with a cutter)

Me: Menar kah? Oh... (Really? Oh...)

~ rushed into toilet. Got business can't wait ba. Came out and saw some female students standing outside the sick bay and some colleagues talking to them

Me: Nama hal nya cikgu V? (What is it Mdm V?)

Mdm V: Eh, nembiak begagai ngena cutter nyau tetucuk ka kaban... (Eh, students playing around with a paper cutter and now accidentally cut their friend).

Me: Pia... Balat? ( Is it? Serious?)

Mdm V: Pama ga peda aku... Bisi nya bejait legik. (Quite bad from what I see... It'll require stitches)

Me: Apu, bendar ndar nya. Kelas ni? Pom satu? (Apu, that's serious. Which class? Form 1?)

Mdm V: Pom satu apa! Tuk ah, sida ke gagut tu nya ah... Pom 6AA*! (What Form 1?! These ah, these (how to say gagut in English?) ... Form 6AA*!)

Me: Ah? Indu? (Ah? Girls?)

Mdm V: Ba ia... (that's why...)

Me: Pey... Nti tek lower form tadi baik gak gik... Tu nyau bala inik sema jaku agik ka begagai baka nya... (Pey... If it was lower form students it's not that bad... These are old enough to be grandmothers still play around like that...)

Mdm V: Nya meh... Aku nyau kesal ati meda darah tadik. ( That's why... I got scared looking at the blood)

Me (talking to the students): Balat gak kitak udah gagut baka tu agik begagai baka anak mit. Nya kumbai org tuai keranjur ka antu nama utai baka nya... Begagai bangat kelalu... Nya bisi ditat ke jait nya legi. Bikin malu kaum wanita ja... (You are old enough but still play like children. That's what the elderly refer to as 'keranjur ke antu'. you went too far... You'll have to bear the pain from the stitches later. A shame to women only)

*might not seem that funny but for me it was kind of funny since I was expecting some lower form boys but instead got the neneks Form 6. Muahahaha...

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Part 2

~on my way out from my MPV (vocational) class.

Me: Okay class, see you again tomorrow.

Students: Thank you teacher!

Me: HK, please help me to carry these dictionaries.

HK: So heavy teacher... bla..dont know where to hantar... bla...

Me: (evil stare)

HK: okay..okay...

~ reached Staff Development Room. The door was closed.

HK: Teacher, can open the window?

Me: There's a big door there and you want to enter through the window? Bukan main besar lagi pintu itu kamu nak masuk guna tingkap?

HK: Heheh...

* Students from this class fall under the low proficiency category. Last year they could hardly string a sentence in English. Now, at least they're able to string a sentence (even if it's not 100% correct). Without fail, these boys made me smile and laugh (inside) although they do make my blood boil every now and then. Haha...

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Part 3

~ On my way to my car. Bumped into Pooh who's also going back.

Me: Pulai dik Nie? (Going back?)

Pooh: Auk, pulai meh. Aie, nama pintu nya geguyat? (walks to the Sick Bay door. We parked right in front of it).. Eh, tunggu cikgu ambil kunci. (Yes, I am. Aie, why is the door shaking? Eh, let me get the keys)

Me:???

Pooh: Bisi nembiak tekunci ba dalam. Apu, ka ngiga matron ku ngambi kunci. (There's a student locked inside. Apu, need to find matron to get the keys)

Me: Ba ofis bisi kunci spare pelaba ku. (I think there are spare keys in the office)

~ Pooh quickly went to the office to get the spare keys.

Me: Tunggu sekejap, nanti cikgu bukakan pintu. Macam mana la kamu boleh terkunci ni? (Wait for a while, we will unlock the door for you. How on earth did you get locked inside?)

~ Waited for Pooh to come with keys. Turned the ignition on. Started to smile sheepishly..

Me: Kenapalah kamu tak minta tolong? Senyap-senyap saja. Kalau cikgu 'Pooh' tak perasan tadi, bermalam la kamu kat sana. (Why didn't you cry for help... So quiet. If cikgu 'Pooh' didn't realize, you'll be spending the night there).

~ Sat inside the car. Started to giggle la pulak. When Pooh opened the door, I saw the kid's face. That's it, I roared with laughter. I know I'm supposed to pity the kid but I couldn't help it. It was so damn funny okay. Pooh was laughing as well. I laughed the whole drive home. Serius lawak case la.

* The poor kid was resting or sleeping in the sick bay. Apparently the Ketua Warden (KW) or Ketua Guru Disiplin (KGD) didn't realize that someone was still in the sick bay so they locked the door after school session ended. What made it seeem so funny to me was the kid's action. She didn't cry out for help, just shook the door. Didn't even knock to get attention. Mau aku tak gelak? So many teachers and students passed by and no one even realized that someone's locked inside because no one heard her.