Pain Magnified

What a way to end the 1st month of the year!

By being sick sick sick.

Been trying to fight off the fever-ish symptoms since last few weeks but finally, it caught up with me - in a big way this morning.

When I tried to get up at 5am, found myself unable to open my eyes, head felt very heavy and all the joints on my body creaking mad in pain.

Every.single.movement.is.pain.magnified.

SMS'ed my superior informing them that I'm unable to go to work. Swallowed some meds. Tried to sleep it off. Woke up. Showered (I must shower even if I'm sick/feverish - feel icky if I don't) and went to the clinic.

Had a very long wait at the clinic. A lot of ppl also feeling under the weather, maybe because of the weather?? Doc gave me 2 days MC and some meds. Told me to come again if my condition persists as I may require a blood test to rule out chiku or dengue (The dreaded chiku has been making its rounds at my workplace. Some of my colleagues already contracted it).

Haih! So much work and now this! Can imagine my work piling up as I type this.

*sigh*

Amukan Bil 1/2010

If I get screwed because of your stupidity, guess just how screwed you will be once I'm done with you?????

12th Day of 2010

It's the 12th day of 2010 and I haven't written not even a single line, let alone a proper post?!

Is my blogging days over?!

...



...



...


Okay, stop clutching your chest/heart or pulling your hair while screaming your lungs out.

I'm not quitting.

It's just that school's back in business and this time of the year is the busiest period of the year ( I have meetings almost every day. Sometimes up to 3 meetings per day) o.O'

Also, the new year brings new (and more) responsibilities, so I have a lot of re-adjustments to do. Still getting the hang of it although I had to hit the ground running. It ain't easy, but I know I can do it! *Yeah, super optimistic me. Ask me again in a couple of months! LOL!*

What does the new year bring me? A lot of opportunities and challenges intertwined together. This year I'm appointed as 'Ketua Guru Lembaga Pengawas' (my friend said it should've been Lembaga Pengganas...LOL!), 'Ketua Pentaksir Sekolah ULBS SPM', Trainer for both Projek Gemilang (Parliamentary Debate & Public Speaking) as well as the English Editor (cum Photographer) for the School Magazine. Actually I was also appointed (again) to be in the Staff Committee and the AJK Perhimpunan but I had to decline the two appointments as I think I sure have too much things for my two not-so-scrawny hands. Plus, I think it's also wise to give others a chance to be in those two committees.

It was not an easy decision for me to make as well, because although I'm honored to be given such level of faith/trust, I don't think it's wise to have my abilities stretched thin. I rather go for quality rather than quantity. Most importantly, my clients' need. Yes, my students are my clients. They should come first.

Some of my colleagues told me that I should try to just bear it beacuse I'm yet to be confirmed (bila la aku nak pergi Induksi ini? Jgn la time exam dah dekat oi!), as doing so may 'affect' my confirmation process. Yes ladies and gentlemen, kuasa di tangan Boss! I can't help but beg to differ. I don't want to wake up dreading every minute of the day. Kerja cikgu sudah cukup hazardous to sanity tau?!

I consulted some of the senior teachers before making my decision. Thanks to Kak Ju, Mdm J and Mdm R(mummy!), I finally plucked enough courage to face off meet my Boss. Siap baca doa penyejuk hati, penenang jiwa sebelum masuk jumpa Boss. Hahaha...

Thankfully my Boss understands my situation. I listed all of my responsibilities as well as my teaching schedule (which is filled to the max okay!), and discussed why I need to decline some of the appointments. So, hip hip hoorey!!! Tabik spring Boss!!!!

So, that sums up some of the happenings so far.

Here's to a great year ahead! Cheers!

p/s: I know I should change the header since Christmas is over... but soooooo busy la :-(

Flashback 2009

2009 was a tumultuous year for me.

It started on a very bad note and every day was a personal hell of a struggle for me. At that time, it seemed like the dark days are going to remain forever.Only my closest friends knew the nitty-gritty details. These bunch of friends are privy to my most personal thoughts and feelings and they were my pillar of strength during those days. I am truly blessed to have them as my closest, bestest friends. Love you lots girls!

Life were truly hell during those days and yet at work I continued to be the same cheerful, upbeat person. Work was the only place I can escape the pain since being busy kept me from wallowing in misery. Everyone who knew me at work saw me joking and laughing as hard as ever but in reality, I was crying in my heart. I laughed because I believed that by laughing and joking, I could chase the blues away. I guess it worked as slowly but surely, I started to feel better albeit only at work.

The moment I reached home, the pain returns. The hurt of seeing objects that reminds me of the most painful, heartbreaking moment of my life. It hurt.

My room became my sanctuary. I kept to myself, keeping all communications at home to the absolute minimum. I was building my defences, anything to prevent from being hurt again. At times I wondered if things will ever get better at home...

And it did.

Slowly but things did change.

I know I changed. I became more assertive. I fought for what I believe in. Never been a stubborn one in the family and definitely not one to go against others, my change caught my family by surprise.

Promising signs are showing now, and I'm happy to see it.

I'm finally nearing the light at the end of the tunnel. It ain't over yet, but soon... soon, I will find my bliss.

To my dear readers,

Happy New Year 2010
May the coming year brings blessings, happiness, success, love and prosperity into our lives.
God bless!

xoxo
Chris AnakApai

Snapshot: Christmas Cookies ver 1.0

This year I decided to bake only 2 types of Christmas cookies due to time constraint. Okay, maybe 3 if I can manage... Can't believe that last year I baked 5 types of cookies! o.O

Anyway, Christmas is not about how many types of cookies or cakes that we bake, or the table fully laden with food; It's the fellowship and camaraderie that we experience with family, friends and loved ones that matters.

Anyone want to come over for some Christmas visiting? You are very welcome to come! :-)

Season's Greeting

Wishing you a blessed and merry Christmas.
May the light of Christmas shines forever bright
Bringing joy, peace and harmony to the world.

p/s: For those travelling back for Christmas, have a safe journey.